Monday, September 13, 2010

Advice Please

This sweet little child has been a bit of a challenge for me lately. I know I post a lot of cheerfulness on this blog, but she is 19 months so you all know it can't be peachy all the time right?! She started nursery last month and hated it from day 1. I thought as each week passed it would get better, but instead, each week has gotten worse. She screams NON stop the whole time, often leading the nice ladies to bring her back to me or Steve. We have tried sneaking out, leaving slowly, bribing her with treats, everything we could think of but to no avail. She HATES nursery. Any ideas?
But wait...the story gets better. Yesterday as the nice nursery lady was bringing a screaming Miss E back to me, our sweet child BIT her on the neck. Nice, huh? Yep, biting is her new favorite defense. Any ideas for that one?
Thanks in advance to all of you smart, wonderful women/mothers that I am privileged enough to call friends. You are all great examples to me and I need your knowledge now!

5 comments:

Jessie said...

I have no idea! I don't look forward to these kind of days... especially the terrible two's! As a nursery leader, we had a little girl like that. She threw a fit for months. But her parents were consistent and eventually she warmed up to nursery and became one of my favorite little people!

Jessie said...

I have no idea! I don't look forward to these kind of days... especially the terrible two's! As a nursery leader, we had a little girl like that. She threw a fit for months. But her parents were consistent and eventually she warmed up to nursery and became one of my favorite little people!

Jason and Kristine said...

This sounds exactly like my Ben. We thought he was going to love nursery too, but he only loves it if one of his parents is sitting in a chair in the room. If it looks like we're even thinking about leaving he starts crying hysterically and grabs onto you.

Basically this means Jason has had to sit in there with him for the whole 2 hours for the last few months because I'm in primary and can't. He's tried all the tricks too, but Ben's crying so hard after he leaves he usually goes back in.

GOOD NEWS!! This last Sunday, I took him and stayed for a few minutes until he was busy playing and then I said bye to him and walked out. He started crying, but the nursery lady picked him up and held him for about 20 minutes. Then they started singing songs and he started getting into it and by the time I came back he was playing by himself with toys.

Maybe 3 months is what it takes! :) Good luck!!! She'll get there with time!

Sally Barrington said...

I had kinda the same problem with Persais at the gym. So I did lots of research. And this is what I found. 1st visit: Stay and play for a bit to help child get comfortable. Also choose an leader that can be your child's person.
2nd visit: Enter with child and get re acquainted with "person" than let them know you are going to leave soon but you'll stay for a bit and have lots of fun for that time.

Leaving: Very important! When you leave it must be a matter of fact. If you show guilt or hesitance your child will feel it too and all is lost. So be brave and just leave.
p.s. you can however have a leaving ritual. Like having you child push you out the door or blow you kisses (that's what Persais does).

Coming back: Try to always take the time to make your reunion special. Hugs, kisses, high fives, ect.
p.s. your child might cry when you get there. that's ok. their just expressing their relief that you came back. (you may have to do 2nd visit a few times to get a hang of it.)

3rd visit: Walk in together. Find person. Say good bye and then leave.

If your child cry's: Give it a good 10-15 minutes before you enter, calm your child down, leave and start the process again.

I hope this helps it was a life saver for us. Good luck.

Sally Barrington said...

1st visit: when I stay a bit I mean both of you should leave together. You may want to stay for just a half hour or the whole time. That's up to you. Remember to always have your person playing with your child to get the best results.